SD Gundam Force

[DuelGundam2099]

Because I have seen every entry in the Gundam franchise outside of half of SD Gundam Scramble, SD Gundam Festival, and the compilation movies for Turn A and 00, I figured this was inevitable. Like how Banshee went through ZZ Gundam I will trek through this complete with episode commentary, screen shots, very bad in-jokes, and me grieving over being banned from MAHQ. I don't think I'll ever get over it, but we'll get back to that later, on to the first episode!

The year is whatever the hell it is, humans and robots live together for manual labor and playing with children 'cause they can.

Jim vs. GM, battle of the baseball teetons!

The humans and robots live in a giant city called Neotopia which is like a utopia, but with the hip, the now, and the pop-art!

Now if only other landscapes were not so boring looking.

However, in another dimension or something, some commander zaku looks on to a dimensional mirror wanting to conquer Neotopia for robot killing and enslavement.

Clearly an allegory for Gaddafi maybe.

So he and a platoon of zaku 2s use a ship to land into a field of flowers.

Get used to it, all the backgrounds look like this.

After landing too far from their destination, the zaku commander tells his minions to spray the area with mosquito versions of bigro because he hates organic life. A GM and Ball stop by to telling him to friggin' stop.

Naturally the villain is not phased and uses a pair of machine guns to destroy the defenseless bots. Tomino might have been proud in the older days.

Some human, who is the main character and his name escapes me, is about to be targeted from the bigro swarm until the main gundam hero appears.

I swear those look like square pimples.

Naturally he starts putting the hurt down.

Take your votoms, kids! Theeeeeeey're GREAT!

The commander calls in for reinforcements to flea and blasts Captain Gundam into oblivion. The human later returns to his home to see CG crashed through his workshop and tries to repair him. After failing throughout the night he eventually tries to resort to the story of Sleeping Beauty (yes this actually happened).

Do I have to say anything else?

Before the human does, CG's chest opens up and reveals a glowing orb that eventually revives him. CG receives an alert that the zakus are back at a construction site. The commander claims they are liberators before crashing his ship nearby.

I could make a drunk driving joke, but that would be tasteless. Plus I don't drink beer so.... Eh.

Instead of being saviors though they open fire on the construction workers with CG coming out of nowhere to shield them. It is that moment that CG realizes he has no shield and cannot fight back. The human skates over and gives him his shield and then this happens:

Little robot versus battleship main guns, totally a fair fight!

Then this happens:

So is it Original Gundam Mark 1? Alex Gundam? Shining Gundam?

The not-finger sends the zakus and energy back into their home dimension and the cops arrive at sunrise. The human asks for his name and then.... THIS:

Now with some of F91!

And so the episode ends with a silly note.

One down, fifty one to go!

So anybody else watch this at some point? I know it was once on Toonami.

Edited February 27, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[David Hingtgen]

After reading your post, I'm glad I never caught more than ten seconds when it was on toonami.

[Gubaba]

I gotta admit... as lame as this series is, the first Japanese OP is amazing,

And I'm not just saying that because I slept with met the two girls who sang it.

Edited February 27, 2013 by Gubaba

[Archer]

I remember this show when it was on Toonami, I think when I was still in elementary school. Needless to say, I ate up anything Gundam back then, and thought it was a considerably good, and fairly comical show. That being said, it is not hard to entertain an 8 year old

Ah, that takes me back, it was Captain Gundam (ex-78-2/gp-01), Zero (wing zero), and Bakunetsumaru (shining gundam) as the main characters right??

[Gubaba]

I remember this show when it was on Toonami, I think when I was still in elementary school.

Wow, you make me feel old...

[anime52k8]

totally watched this on Toonami as well, I was in middle school though. I know I watched most of it but I can't remember very much. I'm sure I'd like it more now than I did back then.

[Shaorin]

i remember it well, it was often quite adorable.

you guys up there, remembering some of this stuff from back in your respective Elementary and Middle School days... for me it felt like just yesterday!!

you're making me feel damned OLD, ya know that?

Sheesh, i'm "only" 31, for crissakes!!

Edited February 27, 2013 by Shaorin

[plutoniumhunter]

I barely remember watching a couple of episodes... With Zaku Char and Qubeley Haman, and Amuro Gundam...

[DuelGundam2099]

The suicide ward can't contain me and my self destructive habits, on to episode 2!

The episode starts out with CG practicing his martial arts because he is trying to awaken his core as revealed in the last episode which is called a Soul Drive.

And he's doing it in Kunio Okawara real robot fashion.

After realizing it won't activate he decides to wander off. Meanwhile Zapper Zaku is met by one of his superiors at Dark Axis. He explains his failure happened because of Captain Gundam.

Advanced power point presentation is advanced.

Using a pair of funnels to zap Zapper, his superior demands he will not take a second excuse, kind of like how Chris did something similar to me last month. Z2 sends four zakus to find CG 'cause he's too busy trying to pose for Guns and Ammo magazine. Meanwhile CG drops into Choot's workshop.

Stomp is super effective if you're a steel type!

CG tells Choot his situation with the Soul Drive and thinks the human has a connection with it working. Insert work out montage here.

Before we continue let the record show that the black heads are meant to be a joke.

The zakus land on the outskirts because of stealth.

Just a few feet off the ground too many.

The zakus try finding Captain Gundam to no avail even when they see the GM and Ball officers they supposedly killed last episode. They eventually find him doing the robot like a spin cycle, but he spins around so much and has so little of his combat gear that they can't analyze him. Second stupidest thing I have seen this month right after the swimsuit episode of Vividred Operation. Seriously, putting a scarf a head does not equate ninja, especially in bikini attire! Plus at that age it's vomit inducing.

No those are not palm lasers.

One zaku won't stop rotating his head counterclockwise and they head off. Once CG and Choot stop and look at some clouds this happens.

If your hands have halos would you be better playing Halo?

The Superior Defense Guard retrieves CG so that the Captain can give him a lecture about keeping himself top secret much like how people give me lectures why action is a bad thing in science fiction action mecha stories like the fourth episode of Unicorn Gundam. CG's chief sort of understands and right as they finish up Z2 attacks a local construction site again.

Neeeeeeext time! (loud cat hiss)

CG changes into his combat gear using a stargate with a Haro on it because this is from Bandai. Z2 awaits CG and they begin to duke it out.

You could make a short AMV with this guy featuring Judas Priests's All Guns Blazing

CG manages to blast the minions away with his rifle and some votoms kung-fu until Z2 hijacks the cranes.

This story has more in common with J-Decker than Exkaiser, come now Bandai!

The cranes dump crates on him, zakus are about to fire, Choot shows up, CG uses SD powers and the shining fiendgar punchi, the zakus are flown back to Dark Axis, everything is restored, friendship is now an order, and CG is introduced to Choot's family off screen including his hippie father.

Edited February 28, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[Beltane70]

I'm with Gubaba and the feeling old bit! I was in my early 30s when this was on Cartoon Network.

[DuelGundam2099]

Darn suicidal thoughts can't get lost, on to episode 3!

The episode begins in a forest the Dark Axis turned into concrete with all the plants and wildlife stone solid. A knight-like figure sees everything in secret.

Count the shades of blue if you dare.

The SD force comes in and takes the petrified animals away for analysis.

We'll let the taxidermy handle this mess.

Meanwhile CG visits Choot who is working on a kite to help the captain in combat when Dark Axis eventually returns.

Cheap support unit is cheap.

Meanwhile at Dark Axis, Z2's superior is PO'd about a second failure and because Captain Gundam is a gundam they have to call in the Tom Kennedy villain: Grabber Gouf.

A zaku this certainly is not like a cup of ham soup against the egg empire and their tacos for in a thousand years they were assassinated by the sailor elves of mercury.

Naturally the two of them don't get along because one is designed for close combat and the other long range combat.

Just a mobile suit passing through.

On the Neotopia outskirts the human and CG attempt to test the kite and start by demonstrating super glue. Then this bimbo named Sayla walks along with Choot expressing his crush on her.

Why does her hair look like phalli? Apparently Wendy from Age copied off her.

She's disturbingly creepy, gross, and is clearly an underage drawing, what does Strike Zero see in characters like this again? So the humans and CG test out the kite and Sayla offers Captain Gundam some cake despite the fact robots don't eat.

He has his hands full, leave the bot alone.

Choot tells CG not to eat "his" cake and tells him the haro stargate appeared. Sayla grabs the kite as CG preps for combat. Choot follows as Sayla makes an incredibly stupid comment about wire length fitting in her car- It's too stupid to make sense of; just like how dumb enough she is not to let go of Choot's kite when he's off to help CG. Anyway, Dark Axis uses these guys again.

Why is Gabro so ignored?

G2 sees a giant swanbot and tells his zakus to take them to Captain Gundam.

Swans have so many suitors for no good reason.

After that fails, Captain Gundam and G2 duke it out in close quarters.

The only normal gundam series where beam sabers aren't instant death, everybody take note!

Z2 butts in and tries to deal with CG himself. Then this happens.

Not that he'd eat it anyway.

During the fighting, Choot uses his super glue to stick the zakus and CG in place as G2 hijacks the swanbot into his own Geister Robo knockoff.

Now if only we had King Duckdorah, that would be a fight!

The humans try to sway off G2 but fail until they start falling until they are rescued by not-Wing Zero: Zero the winged knight.

Because this song needed referencing.

Zero brags about how lovely and princess-like Sayla is because she either looks like his princess or he has a princess fetish, kind of ironic since he sounds like a woman. This guy is an allegory of Strike Zero from MAHQ, outside of insulting people for no reason of course. While we're at it Choot can be Wingut and Arbiter Gundam (we know him as Banshee) can be Captain Gundam, kind of debating if Amuro NT1 should be Grabber Gouf and if Xenoscythe could be Zapper Zaku. Well, more allegories later, right now G2 recognizes Zero and fails at fighting him. As swanzilla is about to crush everyone G2 fires a missile 'cause he can.

Overkill is overkill.

Zero becomes FABULOUS and uses a magical hurricane to save everyone and send Dark Axis to their home dimension.

Because Clamp is the anti-Go Nagai.

Fitting topic since Destiny_Gundam started reviewing Rayearth today and told people not to take 4 years to do reviews. Anyway, Captain Gundam does his super golden punch, Zero is rewarded with the bimbo's cake, and Choot is disappointed.

She isn't 18 yet, lay off already.

Edited March 2, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[anime52k8]

I always enjoyed the pathetic little SD Zaku's

[DuelGundam2099]

No suicide hotline is going to solve my problems, off to episode 4 we go.

The episode begins with Z2 and G2 arguing in front of their boss on the zaku-fied Musai.

Not your friend, guy! Not your guy, buddy! Not your Buddy, friend!

Their boss tells them to STFU, stop thinking, and think of a way (irony I know) to get the gundams back to their base less the reap the consequences.

Their reaction, not mine.

Meanwhile at Choot's house he shows CG some of his inventions such as a voice changing microphone.

How to cheat on American Idol according to this anime.

After the human demonstrating some magnetic roller blades, CG is called into action. The zakus are around some construction site with the two leaders arguing what to do. CG shows up to beat some zakus and shortly following is none other than pedo knight.

Seriously, where is that third gundam from the intro?

Z2 decides to take on Captain Gundam himself and G2 summons the zaku armada.

Because nobody was going to make a reference to Blind Guardian's Valhalla.

The two gundams cartoonishly defeat the armada until G2 uses a bazooka that traps them in a ball of yellow rubber. Z2 acts like a dick, tries to steal it, and the same thing happens to them.

Bad taste would taste bad, hooray for more bad puns!

The zakus take both balls aboard the ship and fly off. Choot follows using his magnetic skates. Once taken to the Musai, pedo knight tells CG that Dark Axis was once the dimension of Le Cross or however it's called; like Macross but without pop stars.

Incoming the imperial march!

After the two commanders are free using a solution, Choot steals it and runs off. The zakus resort to using the bigros.

SKATE OR DIE!

Choot eventually tricks one zaku off an edge where he falls below.

Landing of soft things is girly and un/m/anly.

The human frees both gundams and they descend to the planet's surface.

Payback for trying to kiss me awake in the first episode, ya meat bag.

Pedo knight saves them and tells Choot to open the zakurello gate while the two of them distract the zakus. The human tries but fails miserably and in his anger the gundams think they are being signaled. Z2 fires on them with a main cannon because he likes acting manly much to G2's dismay.

Almost more fisted hams than Gundam Age. Almost.

The two break out their special attacks only to fail. Choot then remembers his voice imitating microphone and opens the gate. The three of them fall out of the sky and on to a cloud that is actually CG's base. Why Choot was not squashed is a mystery. CG is about to introduce Choot to Chief Haro as Zero flies off, probably to find the princess lolis he loves to much.

Edited March 4, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

Do not mind me I just feel like wanting to die, here is episode 5.

After a two minute recap of the last episode CG and Shoot find themselves on the SDGF fortress. The haro gate CG uses to change shows up and Shoot gets all giddy.

Stargate Atlantis was clearly in desperation for sponsors.

Captain Gundam explains that the fortress is disguised as a cloud and is suspended in air using satellites in orbit, which I have to say is quite creative. Soon after, Chief Haro finally shows his ugly head.

As seen on the Terrance and Philip Show.

Haro likes the work Shoot has been doing and wants to congratulate him. With that he turns the human into an honorary member of the SDGF and assigned to the same unit as Captain Gundam. Meanwhile at Dark Axis Z2 and G2 are given the talking to and have a new member of their team named Destroyer Dom join them.

Once death has been mass produced....

Apparently Zapper and Grabber have a serious history with D2 as he loves destroying things like a boss and are quite scared of him. Kind of like how Strike Zero was afraid to answer questions I have because of his soft spot for girly junk or how Ryujin has a pathological fear of saying I am more intelligent than a minnow or how ShadowCell is obnoxiously paranoid and the etcetra. What? I could think of FAR worse insults! Don't think for half a second I'd ever forget- Getting back on topic the Dark Axis tries to pass through the Zakurello gate with the Komusai getting stuck and barely able to get through. Meanwhile at the base Haro gives Shoot a badge.

I bet it taste like a banana.

There is little time to celebrate as Dark Axis happens to have landed near an experimental dimensional opener that is what kept the Zakurello from functioning properly. D2 starts destroying everything with the others soon following and CG arrives just in time.

Like a boss.

Just as the battle is about to happen some doctor who's name I forgot comes in from underground and tells everyone to mellow out.

Word(s cannot describe that 90s haircut).

Apparently this kid is the main doctor of the SDGF that worked on the dimensional tower D2 is having a blast with (literally).

So epically manly. EVERYBODY DIES!

So the action kicks in just as Zero the pedo knight comes in because he can. Zero takes on G2 while CG takes on Z2.

Like a clean corvette and on high octane.

Because D2 is having a hard time locking onto opponents so he uses his Gallop to weapon spam everything in sight with no discrimination.

There are a dozen more weapons in this; this caption is not a joke for once.

Everything is crumbling with everyone being blasted about until a dimensional portal opens up and a fire ball comes out of it.

Goodness gracious GREAT BALLS OF FIAR!

The fire ball happens to be the third gundam of the series named Bakumetsumaru who I think is supposed to be either God Gundam or Double X Gundam.

I am very much aware I forgot to type the "maru" part of his name. Seriously, weird long name is weird long.

Pedo knight knows he is from a former boarding country called Arc and the two gundams fight each other until CG takes a hit (losing his left arm) as D2 fires toward the samurai bot. Not pleased with this, Baku the long named uses a giant X of fire released from his katanas.

Even herpes could not survive this if its life depended on it.

With that X the Dark Axis is sent back, Baku becomes respected, and the tower crumbles much to the doctor's dismay.

Edited March 10, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[anime52k8]

Bakumetsumaru is shining gundam and I'm pretty sure the horse he rode in on is based on Fuunsaiki.

although

his power-up/armor-up form, Bakushinmaru, is based on God gundam in it's super mode.

:edit:

actually, there's a clear pattern to it all:

all of the guys from Ark are based on Mobile Fighter G Gundam designs.

all of the Native SDG guys are based on early UC (i.e. pre UC.0110) Earth Federation gundams.

all of the Dark axis guys are based on early UC Zeon suits

all of the Lacroa guys are based on gundam Wing suits.

:edit: :edit:

BTW, I think it's worth mentioning because few people seem to realize this but Captain gundam is Based on the RX-78 GP-01.

The connection will be much clearer when you see his hyper form (i.e. when he turns in to GP-01FB)

Edited March 10, 2013 by anime52k8

[DuelGundam2099]

My misery is so endless, here is episode 6. Also to note that is is Grappler Gouf, not Grabber, my bad!

To start of the episode, Baku looks around Neotopia looking for Dark Axis goons to fight.

Burn baby burn!

Zero shows up and tells him to calm the hell down and so begins a short "duel". Shoot and CG do not approve.

This cannot end well.

After Baku gets ticked at pedo knight for spawning flowers on him, this statue comes out of nowhere.

And you never thought the 50 Foot Woman was a statue, did you?

Pedo knight does not think it is from Dark Axis while Baku does so they keep fighting.

Less than meets the eye.

The statue is actually a vessel/ferris wheel used by Neotopia's mayor (who looks exactly like the statue), and is pleased to meet the gundams. As pedo knight and Baku bicker some more she kindly tells everyone to go home saying they are shooting a movie. Meanwhile Baku complains about going home (oh how I can relate with the forums I was banned from) with the inclusion of his destructive methods last episode.

The NDAA of 2012 does not care, peasant.

After pedo knight bothers Baku some more, Z2 and his minions somehow managed to hide in the statue's ferris wheel.

Nobody will see me here unless they've seen the Batman anime! Mwuahahahahahaha!

And so a new geister robo knockoff is born for a rampage!

Borrowing the power of the sun to ruin meganoid ambitions.

Using an over sized speaker as a sonic weapon, probably because the staff was sexist, the statue goes on a rampage and Baku tries to hunt Z2 down because he thinks he can get him back to Arc. Lots of fighting occurs until CG gets caught.

We still have Roger Corman!

The mayor, for some reason not even dodging potential sonic death, tells Shoot that the speaker can be turned off on the palette platform on her left hand. After a dangerous climb Shoot shuts it off and the zakus attempt a retreat with Baku following.

Who the hell do you think I am? That Kamina guy?

After beating the hell out of the zakus, the Zakurello opens up and takes them home. Baku is about to go through until Shoot is flung from the statue and he rescues him just before he goes splat.

And they claim Kira has all the plot armor, whatever that is.

Everyone tries to get Baku through the gate before it closes only for it not to work.

So close.

At least one good thing came from it, the mayor uses footage from an unspecified camera to turn the situation into a movie.

No confirmation on a sequel yet.

Because five minutes are left the zakus put on a stage show.

Talk about retro.

It is just a minor recap with the main characters explained by three zakus until Z2 tells them the show is over.

Now if only we had Gundam: The Musical.

[anime52k8]

That's another thing, the ZakoZako Hour bits where by far the best thing about this show.

[DuelGundam2099]

Life seems dreadful when you have no place to call home, here is episode 7. Tomorrow I might do episode 8 and quit due to depression 'cause I just haven't been happy for years and the past month has been so miserable that I've given death some serious thought. With that said....

The episode begins with Baku training at Shoot's house because he is a manly man, but Zero spawns roses to annoy him for no reason.

The battle of Manly Man and Pedo Knight is about to begin!

Captain Gundam tells shoot that his teacher will be coming to visit him, presumably for extra training, and shortly arrives. The teacher's name is Gunbike and he is.... your typical drill sarge.

Captain Gundam is disappointed in his meat bag sidekick.

Gunbike goes on to teach the gundams (Shoot included) that he means business.

You're lucky Neotopia is lazy when it comes to the Jessica Lovesford Act.

Meanwhile, G2 is planning to install a couple of control horns onto a moving train because what villainy would be complete without a train heist, right? Well....

And here I thought Grappler Gouf was smart.

After Gunbike forces Shoot to do a bad imitation of a wolf, the gundams are alerted to G2's mustache twirling plot and move out. Just before catching the train, G2 made it with a boat (yes they actually call the sled that) and installs a couple of control horns to make a knockoff of the EI-08 from GaoGaiGar.

Now to follow the yellow brick road like the gold standard!

The gundams catch up to them amazingly with no references to old western movies.

Manly men riding manly horses like men.

Zero goes after G2 while Baku takes on the zakus and CG tries to snipe the control horns. However, their bad use of teamwork causes much confusion much to Gunbike's dismay.

To make a Heero Yui quote or not at the irony, decisions decisions.

The battle between pedo knight and G2 continues until he flies into a wall as well.

Ashton Kutcher was really desperate for money for the show at that point.

After some sharades with the zakus and tunnels, manly man and CG try to attack G2 to no avail since they both have different ideas of defense.

All in favor say DIE!

G2 manages to knock Baku off, with CG trying to save him, and lead it toward a zakurello gate right behind a power plant. Why? Because Fox had yet to secure copyright laws for the movie Unstoppable.

Like a boss!

Gunbike tells the good guys to get their heads out of their rectums and do some teamwork before he drives them to catch up. The Soul Drive is activated in CG for a speed boost.

YABBADABBADOOOOOOOOOO!

Upon catching up, CG falcon kicks G2 into the Zakurello gate.

POW! Right in the kisser!

The control horns are destroyed, the trains derail but remain safe, and everyone learns a valuable lesson. The zakozako show gives a brief rundown on Dark Axis technology before G2 gets angry they stole his sled.

Edited March 18, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

Morbid depression is morbid like a Florida tribune. Episode 8 has landed at New York harbor.

The episode starts off with Zero having a bad memory of his fetish slave girl err I mean the Lacross princess being turned to stone as he is sucked into a dimensional portal. Shortly after, Shoot goes to a giant bakery that uses GMs for slave labor as they construct a giant cake for Mayor Margarette.

And all it cost was manipulating the stock market and real estate market.

The bakery is run by a giant computer named Annie.

In strangest eons even death may die.... And Ms. Pacman mutates horribly via the yithians.

Meanwhile CG tries to calm Baku down about him wanting to go home and sees the professor is not helping out.

Laaaaaaaaaazy.

Shortly after Baku throws a fit, D2 sneaks in with his Gallop to go gundam hunting only for two zakus to have cleaned it out. D2 asks where his weapons are before throwing them right near the factory. After we find the bimbo Sayla being the one in charge of cake duty, the zakus mistaken the dessert for a weapon and try to run off before Annie spots them and tries to use them as slave labor.

Ironically this review was done shortly after the premier of an episode of the US version of Hell's Kitchen.

The zakus try to escape only for one of them growing enough of a brain to convert Annie to their side using a control horn.... That one of them seemingly had.

Still more met expectations than the bacteriophage alone from Vividred Operation.

Before I continue the review I am going to say that GOSH DARN IT VIVIDRED I EXPECTED YOU TO CARE A LITTLE ABOUT YOUR MONSTERS OF THE WEEK! YOU HAD A BACTERIOPHAGE VIRUS FOR F**K SAKE AND IT ONLY GOT ONE MINUTE OF SCREEN TIME!? FOR POINTLESS FANSERVICE GARBAGE!? I ACTUALLY WROTE A PAPER ON THOSE THINGS IN SIXTH GRADE BECAUSE HOLY F**K WERE THEY SCARY AS F**K! OFEUIH3PO4UHR9PYFFH9OHYH34O;H!!!!!!!!!!

Ahem.

Just as Annie makes a mess good old pedo knight shows up.

Seriously, how is he not acting like a metrosexual at this point?

Speaking of fruity, pedo knight drops his sword after being ambushed by D2 with a bunch of strawberries. This allows him to take Zero's sword for himself.

Destroyer Dom is now a master of the flipping universe, eat that Galactus!

D2 thinks that the giant birthday decorations are weapons and uses them to his advantage with the two zakus aiding.

In all fairness the cake has enough sugar to convert an entire town into diabetics.

The zakus unleash the bigros and Shoot goes to save Sayla as Zero holds off the villains with an eggbeater. I could make a beat off pun but.... No.

CLIMB SLY CLIIIIIIIIMB!

Zero barely holds his own until D2 fires a pair of candle missiles at Sayla, which pedo knight stops because nobody is violating her before him/reminds him of how he could not save his slave/princesses. He succeeds but still gets his rectum handed to him while the human tries to contact CG and Baku.

This is why you choose Vorizon.

Eventually they do arrive, the gundams use their special attacks once Zero gets his Buster Sword back, and the control horn is damaged with Annie very ticked.

I can so relate to this when I was in public school.

The villains are thrown out (literally) while the bimbo reveals the mayor's cake.

So that is where our money to China went.

The mayor likes her surprise, Zero delivers the cake, and Baku and Shoot become angry for reasons more pathetic than my incredibly depressing poetry as to why I miss MAHQ. The zakozako hour mentions Tallgeese and Destroyer Dom's Gallop before D2 beats two of them off stage.

So is anyone actually tuning into these reviews or am I just mumbling in the dark?

Edited March 27, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

I completely forgot to post the last episode here! So here is a double feature with episodes 9 and 10! This segment of the kicked puppy's reviews is brought to you by the story police!

"What? Story police? Are you 12?" -Strike Zero

Based on a real argumentative point in a Gundam Age topic. Pleasant times....

Episode 9:

So the ep starts out with Baku ticked off at the lazy professor not helping out with trying to get him back home. During this time we see a father and son pair of bots constructing a tunnel.

Boss man's got us working.

However the three Dark Axis commanders send a demolition team of zakus to hijack the father using a control horn.

At least battle droids have common sense.

They quickly use a control horn that I just noticed looks like a Z'Gok.

Probably due to how over rated they are.

The zakus use their pawn to burrow through the area and eventually through Baku and the professor.

Walk for your life!

Construction bot junior (I think his name is Gober but I do not remember) tells them about what happens and even mentions that his dad is being used as a bomb to blow up Neotopia from the ground up. The professor acts like a coward and wants out with Baku trying to convince him otherwise.

That would explain why you have so much fatigue.

So naturally the three of them go after zakus like bosses.

Shoot survived worse, you'll be fine with pot armor on.

The zakus are not pleased and start tossing their seemingly gigantic supply of bombs at them.

Bombs away!

Baku and the professor get onto the construction bot only for the zakus to realize everything is better with spinning.

CHODENJI SPIN!

Things seem bad until the other members of the gundam force get off their rectums and do something.

Anyone can find first gear in their giant robot car, can you find second gear? Dun dun duuuuuuuuun!

Naturally the team fails and Baku tries to fight them with his swords.

Like trying to debate with an Armor Mothra fanboy.

The construction bot spams it's arm powers and Baku horrifically loses.

MUGEN PUNCH!

That is until the professor finds the bravery to remove the main bomb and toss it out.

PANTS TOO LOW. PANTS TOO LOW.

The zakus are thrown out with their bomb and everyone has a happy ending. The zakozako hour talks about the weapons of their commander until they act like alpha males showing off.

Episode 10:

Shoot is having a miserable time because he has to write an essay for his school because even in the future people still think essays have any meaning.

I can so relate to this, it is kind of like having herpes.

The human decides, right in front of his mother, a teacher, that he should ask Captain Gundam to help with the topic of friendship. After Shoot has a hard time describing what friendship is and after an automated laugh both Baku and Zero try to use overtly complex metaphors.

Yes that is a grill, why he is carrying it your guess is as good as mine.

Meanwhile, the Dark Axis's mysterious general tells Z2, G2, and D2 that they need to get along or else.

5 bucks says Z2 says uncle first.

For preparation of the next attack they use their minions in cosplay to fight them.

This is why cosplay should be limited to Halloween and costume parties.

After trashing the poor zakus they head toward the zakurello gate on the kousai in a manly fashion.

I like whomping and chewing bubblegum, sadly I cannot chew bubblegum so guess what is coming!

Upon crashing into a construction site the three of them cause wanton destruction and the gundams dispatch.

They actually explain this coming up.

Upon arrival the Dark Axis, for whatever stupid reason, is actually surprised that more than one of them showed up. D2 takes on CG, Z2 takes on Zero, and G2 takes on Baku.

That top sentence is my actual thoughts to Zero's flower theme, the bottom is just the running joke.

Apparently D2 cannot hit anything even when he is RIGHT IN THEIR FACE, Z2 cannot get passed pedo knight's barrier, and G2's lack of common sense, even when he has a detonator for explosives on the Kousai, causes him to crash and literally burn. The three villains try to combine their power.

Not sure if awesome art or really blurry video quality.

Naturally they take too long, the gundams do their version and win, Z2 accidentally presses the detonator, they blow up, and Shoot still has nothing for his essay.

Coming up is a three parter!

Edited April 1, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

The following contains a borderline suicidal man's whacky thoughts and ultra-horrid jokes; better known in the english language as time to review episode 11.

The episode starts off with Professor Dellwood (lazy kid) testing the effects of the dimensional opener now that it has been complete. They start with a strawberry much to Bakumetsumaru's dismay and/or lack of things fruity.

At least it is more advanced than what North Korea has.

Baku gets testy as the scale of things to throw into subspace has him last in line even after a GM. After going bananas about a banana going next Zero uses his magic on a set.

If Rapeman wrote children's jokes.

However, a portal that emits non-harmful lightning sends the gundams and Shoot through (with a banana Shoot eye humps for no reason); eventually they find themselves in a knockoff of the crystal mine set where you fight Metal Mario in the original Super Smash Brothers.

Golgotha returns from Ultraman Ace to SD Gundam Force, what a leap!

Zero flies off and Captain Gundam walks on an invisible path his sensors can pick up.

I can say that from first hand experience, but only second hand smoke.

Meanwhile, Tallgeese finally appears beyond a mention in the zakozako show as he talks to both the Dark Axis commander and a minion that looks like a cross between a ghost and the G Excellent from Tobikage. He also has a theme or fetish for feathers.

This guy has some serious Guts.

Failed Berserk puns aside the gundams find a ruined castle where Zero acts emo because the area is Lacroa (I thought is was spelled differently but oh well). Baku says sorry until CG detects some enemies.

Seriously, the main gundam does so little in this series!

The enemies are camouflaged, but CG can see right through them and everyone starts attacking the enemies who happen to be leos.

Unfortunately it only works when you break the fine china; then again bootleg gunpla is everywhere.

The leos are revealed to be just dice given a mobile suit-like form because they're magical. Baku notices three rogue leos heading into a cave and everyone falls after only to be revealed that they are actually Lacroa survivors in award winning cosplay.

Cardboard performance from a leo is nothing new.

The three survivors explain their story while three jellyfish fly by. I am not kidding they actually cut to that.

This is to distract you from how low the budget got.

Zero tries to explain that he is a knight of the princess yet the three of them do not believe him and with someone that acts like a metro pedo that loves flowers calling themselves a knight I could not blame them.

Unfortunately Megan's Law does not apply to Lacroa.

Zero convinces them with candy err I mean some rare "princess rose".

I will even have Tony Stewart drive me!

The three call themselves names that rhyme with "oa" before Tallgeese descends with leos surrounding everyone.

My feathers are so FAAAAAAAAAABULOUS!

Tallgeese acts like a dick since he hid the currently petrified princess, hopefully not at Deviant Art, and summons a shield that summons a Griffon.

Goldran called, they want Kaiser back.

The griffon kills the leos for no reason as Zero complains that the monster is wild. Tallgeese sees no issue in this and performs gattai with the beast.

Kawamori has improved since 0083.

Tallgeese prepares to attack.... And then the episode is over! Told you this was a three parter!

[DuelGundam2099]

Depressed am I in an endless night for there is no dawn for the one called I, episode 12 is here though.

Starting where the last episode was, Zero tries to fight him only for the Latoratar combo Tallgeese to lay a beating on him.

Quite suggestive from a dialogue perspective.

The oa trio ask that Tallgeese lay down his arms and griffon and in exchange they will give him something called a Spirit Egg. As Zero's pleas to stop them indicate (and Baku pointing out the obvious) the Spirit Egg is somethingTallgeese has been looking for with rarity and mythical proportions comparable to seeing Shadow Cell using his cap locks.

We tried it with a gallamimus, but Gwangi ate the guy.

Tallgeese, being the George Bush allegory, does not negotiate with enemies and uses a Leo to steal it after throwing pedo knight into a bottomless pit.

Effective against everything but graboids!

Tallgeese lives up to his title of Tempest Knight by summoning a tornado that sends the other heroes down a hole because he is evil like that. Shoot and the oas managed to land in some place that resembles the outskirts of Mesa City from Sly Cooper and The Thievious Racoonous minus sunlight. Speaking of which, they land in ultra-cartoony fashion.

POW RIGHT IN THE KISSER!

The four of them meet up and Shoot tries to contact CG with his phone with the oas commenting on the phone being magical until they realize they cannot reach him.

I knew I should have switched to Vonage!

As the humans try to search for them, Zero finds out he has no means to conjure his magical powers, probably because he has been hanging around guys too much and forgot what women looked like. CG and Baku find themselves in a cave where Baku reveals he has a severe phobia of ghosts even when Captain Gundam tells him to STFU and CTFD.

STOP MAKING BAKUMETSUMARU SO UNMANLY, BANDAI!

Shortly after, Shoot is chased by a giant Bigro through the desert until Zero shows up to fight him.

Time for a chase scene!

Their efforts to fight seem futile until Zero finds a beam saber CG dropped earlier and uses it to slay the Dark Axis minion.

Beam sabers: No defense for them exists for some reason.

Shoot tries to convince the oas Zero is their savior, but they do not believe him as they decide to climb upward. Meanwhile CG and Baku find the corpses of none other than Vayate and Mercurius.

Only of the AU variety no less.

Instead of anything actually coming out and fighting, CG uses his vulcan guns, with Baku jumping in surprise, to find a way out using space distortions. After some calculations he throws Baku and flies himself into these rifts to climb up because he thinks Shoot will do the same.

Approved by Delta Airline because we charge outrageous prices and you cannot do a thing!

Tallgeese meanwhile acts like a silly villain until he opens the Spirit Egg, which he claims opens the Spirit Tree, and finds this hologram inside revealing it was a fake.

I could make a Penn State reference but it would not be tasteful.

After Tallgeese yells we see the other heroes climbing up with two of the three oas thinking Zero might be an okay guy.

Just a thousand bottles of beer to go until we reach the top of mount drunk.

Aaaaaaand that is it! Next episode concludes this story!

Edited April 5, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

Nobody wants a new TDSA for Christmas because TDSA is a tedious ace. That and episode 13 is now available.

Shoot and Zero keep climbing up the giant plateau when Shoot comes across the crystal jellyfish from a couple episodes back.

Help! We need more budget!

Zero tells him to CTFD as they are Mmms (yes that is what the dub calls them), spirits that dwell around caves. This leads to Zero talking about how the griffon is one of four mythical beasts of Lacroa alongside a phoenix, a unicorn, and some other creature that I cannot pronounce.

Wayo wayo wayo wayo! Draw like an Egyptian!

After Tallgeese acts evil and Baku and CG keep climbing we see Shoot and Zero still making their trip with the Mmms following them.

At least wait for The Asylum to knockoff Metroid first.

However, another giant Bigro appears out of the rocks and makes off with Shoot. Zero can't do anything until he sees the banana Shoot eye humped two episodes ago in the rocks. He uses the Bigro's weakness for organic matter to use as bait.

DON! DON! DONKEY KONG! YEEEEEEEEEAH.

Why that would work when the Bigro has a much bigger chunk of what he is attracted to I have zero clue. Meanwhile the oa trio somehow got back to where they were before falling down and Tallgeese throws their fake Spirit Egg at them.

Faker than the sad excuses for comedy on /a/.

Before Tallgeese can do anything, the gundam force arrives to crack a few jokes at him while the oas talk without moving their mouths much (like in the last two eps).

Almost as bad as in Jaws: Unleashed.

Tallgeese uses a fire summoning spell to burn their costumes off revealing the real Spirit Egg.

Since he only worked on Arjuna at the time there was plenty left.

In an attempt to separate the object from the fiend, pedo knight throws the banana on top of Tallgeese's head to distract him.

If only you guys knew how much truth was in that text.

After the Bigro comes up from the ground and is sliced in half, the Gundam Force and Tallgeese spam their powers for a while until he and Zero descend into a pit. Pedo knight throws his sword to cause a stalactite to fall upon the sword's impact.

An accurate representation of the effort thrown into Kampfer.

Zero escapes his own trap, Tallgeese gets buried under rocks (most likely still alive as they imply later), and the Spirit Egg does this.

Or maybe it is the microwaves from Gundam X, who knows.

The oas acknowledge Zero as Lacroa's savior and send everyone home until the Gundam Force is ready to take on the Dark Axis.

That is the power of Sprint Network.

Before they go home the oa trio petrifies because they were actually sorcerers of stone. Shoot gets sad and has an illusion of everyone eating cake before they are greeted back.

Did it not occur to you I was a diabetic?

And we still don't know what happened to the princess.

[DuelGundam2099]

Good news everyone! I found more episodes! The bad news is that the uploader thought it was funny to advertise a site, oi. I can't control it and it comes up at random times so this might get annoying.

You heard the cutesy and mispronounced Cerberus, lets dive the hell in! No less than four of this season's anime will be reference, all of which I started watching since the last review!

The episode begins with the three gundams and Shoot talking about the spirit egg they retrieved from the last episode.

Nobody really knows if the chicken that laid it also had a crystalline birth canal.

As they are talking about it, Baku tries to make a heartfelt speech since they left the oa trio behind.

Inspiration for Justin Bieber? Not ruling out no since this.

After Zero talks about only he should handle the spirit egg, Baku starts making rude comments about how better he is.

Technically he said "ha", but oh well.

The two of them needlessly fight while Commander Haro tells Captain Gundam about invaders in the area. The arguing goes on until a pair of zakus posing as Fox News reporters appear in the distance.

Still not as ugly as the hags from Valvrave and Gargantia.

Everyone except Baku don't fall for their disguise and try to humor them in playing alone as they start this clips how with Shoot.

I am pretty sure they are more interested in the ones from the Cosmic Era.

After Shoot's, Zero has one of him being surprisingly prideful with the zakus showing their own clips.

The devil is a part timer that handles cameras and yes I just referenced that series.

Zero is shown his many failures before Bakumetsumaru starts being prideful himself and shows off his clip show of manly glory.

Yet he still has not figured out why /u/ keeps going into /m/ boards recently.

After Baku gets his moment of shame, Zero makes some insults and the two duel while accidentally switching their weapons.

At least there will be no silly rose spamming.

Meanwhile, Shoot gets the zakus to reveal the Dark Axis base and the existence of the unnamed commander all while Commander Haro records the whole thing.

Real shame they cannot pass for bridge bunnies.

Now with all four current season anime references out of the way.... The zakus are uncovered, with Baku surprised, and they try to run away only to be surrounded.

Not even a Mexican standoff if you were drunk on Cinqo de Mayo.

Suddenly, the spirit egg hatches and forms some floating furry creature that kind of looks like Ghogo from Rebirth of Mothra 2.

Could we not get a Dagahra equivalent instead?

The zakus get a face full of "mouth" fire (yeah, it isn't there, but that is the area it comes from) and they flee. Shoot makes a comment on it looking like a stuffed animal Nana (his baby sister) has and it turns on them, ending the episode.

Fan fiction sometimes does it better.

After the zakozako hour explains a little of the dimensional physics involved the episode ends.

[DuelGundam2099]

Do not forget to tell your mother you love her! Happy mother's day everybody, time for episode 15.

The episode begins with everyone in awe about the spirit of Lacroa with Baku making fun of it before getting fried.

NO MOUTH HOLE.

After Zero pokes fun at Baku, we see the Superior Defenders testing out a flying machine with a Chinese version of Dr. Eggman in charge.

That amazing balance between genius and crazy is with this man.

The doctor, who's name escapes me, says the flying machine is not ready. Meanwhile, the Dark Axis gains jet packs in the forms of gallops or drops or whatever the hell the Earth Federation used as transport ships in the original MSG that Colonel Matilda died in from the Black Tri-Star attack.

The poor kids in California are missing out.

Just as they are about to carry out their flying attack, two zakus were dumb enough to spill control horns over a fancy yellow Kamousai. This causes it to go out of control, go through the zakurello gate, and Z2, G2, and D2 have to follow it unless the commander fries their circuit board. (and yes he actually says that)

Not to be confused with people from /k/.

Back at the Neotopia outskirts we see Baku trying to befriend the spirit only to annoy the little fur-ball.

Sponsored by Snuggy laundry detergent.

After Baku and Zero get burned, Commander Haro tells them of the invaders. The four heroes and GunBike use transport ships, despite the fact Zero himself can fly, to bring the out of control Kamousai down. That is until the reflector bits get in the way.

They must have internal mirrors.

The spirit of Lacroa follows and tries to use it's flamethrower only for the Kamousai to not be a steel type and take the guy in it's left cannon. Because of this desperation, Commander Haro tells the doctor from earlier to launch the new SD Force member GunEagle.

Abusing your employees is not all that universal.

The new GunEagle launches, who is basically Nu Gundam with the double fin carriers of it's Heavy Weapons System Type variant. I was going to show a shot of this guy launching from the catapult, but this was too weird to leave out.

Dubbing for children sure is whacky.

GunEagle tries to do the job himself by unloading his fire power onto the Kamousai.

This is some serious fire power.

Once the reflector bits turn the tides, however, GunEagle falls back and gets introduced to the team while being informed of the spirit of Lacroa. After insulting Zero and GunBike, he heads toward the rampaging vehicle again and tries to use missiles.

The fourth movie shall be your salvation.

Thanks to CG's help the bits are destroyed, but GunEagle still cannot rescue the spirit inside. D2 comes along and causes the Kamousai to go into a tailspin by blasting at it. GunEagle quickly fights the three commanders.

Some versions changed it to "have a little fun" because of silly children.

After that, CG tells GunEagle to go after the spinning vehicle at high speed, which causes him to defy the laws of physics and deflect it.

Because it looks cool to do it that way.

GunEagle uses his beam saber to rescue the spirit and the Kamousai blows up.

Coming to save the mother loving day now. (it is Mother's Day after all)

GunEagle gets rescue by Baku as he runs out of energy, the spirit is returned, they name the fur-ball Fan/Fang/Thang/I don't know exactly, and the new member gets burned for insulting the little guy as everyone else laughs. The Zakozako Hour talks about the new jet packs and how fun they seemingly are.

[DuelGundam2099]

No idea why I did not post this yesterday, I guess I got sidetracked. With that here is episode 16.

Continuing from the last episode, the Kamousai 2 (what was in the last ep) is at the bottom of the ocean and the Superior Defenders cannot get to it. That is until Chinese Dr. Eggman comes up with a solution since nobody else can swim.

Could you imagine Ben Kingsly playing this guy?

With that in mind he introduces new toys err I mean gundams to the Gundam Force, specifically the GunDivers.

Working for Mike Myers on Halloween night so said John Carpenter.

After stock footage of them doing olympic dives into the ocean, they go into their submarine forms while Shoot and CG follow in a ball designed for undersea exploration.

No I do not know what is in the box, Brad Pitt.

Meanwhile, the Dark Axis is also looking for the Kamousai 2, but with everyone loving their new underwater packs it prevents everyone except Grappler Gouf from taking the mission seriously.

Darn it you guys, everyone stop having fun!

The Superior Defenders find the Kamousai 2 and try to bring it to the surface only for the Dark Axis to get epically PO'd and fire missiles (wouldn't torpedoes make more sense?).

Unless you are Michael Bay.

Meanwhile, Zero tries flirting with the bridge bunny from the last episode, who still sounds male but at least not as manish, by being semi-haughty.

This is not Utena, stop with the rose fetishes!

After Fenn burns the rose for comic relief, the GunDivers take on the Dark Axis with very little trouble. However, Zapper Zaku taunts CG about how he can't be touched underwater since his weapons are not designed for underwater combat. Destroyer Dom comes in and blasts the hillside that the Kamousai 2 was resting on.

And everything went boom, the end.

Shoot's ball gets trapped underneath as it plummets down to a depth of 10 kilometers.

Nickelback called and they wanted their song back.

With neither side wanting it to go down, both the SD forces and Dark Axis join forces much like in Char's Counterattack, but to little avail. Commander Haro approves of the release of the other five GunDivers.

This one not based on sentai footage!

With their help, the Kamousai 2 is eventually brought back up and Shoot even thanks the Dark Axis, who are to embarrassed to respond.

Yeah, well, uh, err....

After Z2 spoils the moment, the control horns on the Kamousai 2 reactivate and it starts spinning out of control again.

Much like Jason Voorhees.

The GunDivers do a synchronized whirlpool attack with their propellers to send the Dark Axis forces flying off underwater.

Here I thought swirlies cannot be good.

The GunDivers are accepted onto the team, GunBuke complains he did nothing, and the Zakozako hour has the zakus complaining about how they keep losing.

[DuelGundam2099]

Some days I simply never want to get out of bed because the idea of dying does not seem all that negative. Oh yeah and episode 17 is here.

Getting ticked off at the main three field commanders, the unnamed commander uses his funnels to punish them before introducing a Musha Gundam from Arc named Ashuramaru.

Oh yeah, he seems evil plenty.

After trashing a horde of zakus, he scares the trio and says he wants only to fight his old rival (oh gee guess who). The Musai heads for the zakurello gate while in the asteroids another Musha Gundam that joined the Dark Axis named Cobramaru slowly catches up. Why he is not on the Musai is anyone's guess.

Them snake eyes, man. Not for regular casino goers.

Meanwhile we see Baku polishing one of his two swords and accidentally uses Fenn to polish it at one point. After he and Zero bicker for a bit, this comes from the sky.

A bass solo is demanded.

Baku can read it since it is from Arc and heads off alone to find Ashuramaru waiting for him. They both decide to fight to the death because they are rivals and I have to admit this is a well done action scene and it takes up the rest of the episode. With that here are the highlights: Baku learns of Ashuramaru joining the Dark Axis

Ashura grows more arms as the rest of the SD Force looks on

We get a back story on a humiliating defeat without death that caused the dark side turn

Ashura goes into a demon form and heavily damages both Baku and Captain Gundam

and after Shoot gets in the away Ashura and Cobra decide to vamoose saying they will return.

The Zakozako hour briefly goes over the Musha Gundams being from Arc and how the Dark Axis recruited traitors to help them conquer it.

Edited May 15, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[Shaorin]

Well, Kawa-sama had to be getting his inspiration for MAC-7 from Somewhere, after all...

Edited May 15, 2013 by Shaorin

[DuelGundam2099]

You know what? After the next episode review after this one I am going to do something different: Instead of reviewing it my way like a Cracked.com intern, I am going to act like random forum members and impersonate them while still reviewing! What? It isn't like anyone is reading them. Here comes episode 18 up the throat.

Captain Gundam and Bakumetsumaru are transported onto Gunparries back the the SDG base with Cobramaru climbing outside of one. After the heroes are in the medical bay, he sneaks around the ship where he gets cocky by not using his cloaking.

Tonight on TruTV's World's Dumbest: Dumbest Ninjas!

Cobramaru disables the camera with a dart and shortly does the same to two GM guards, but instead of conking out they simply do not see him.

Worst metaphor for anti-drug PSAs ever.

Meanwhile, CG is undergoing repairs with his soul drive exposed while Baku says he can heal easily if he eats a hundred of rice balls made by Shoot's mom. Shoot, his mom, Sayla, and the bridge bunny, who now has an actually feminine voice, start making rice balls.

Shut up, Ed.

Zero starts catching on and decides to make some himself with his big ones being Baku's favorite of the batch.

Tada! It is maaaagicaaaaaaal.

As Baku gorges himself, Zero tries flirting with the still unnamed bridge bunny who now graduates from background extra to minor character status.

However, the radars go off claiming that Dark Axis forces have begun invading, causing every active member of the Gundam Force to head out including Commander Haro in his custom white Gunperry.

Yes I am aware a second question mark should not be there.

However, we cut to CM who cackles as he reveals it was all a trick to force everyone to leave as he continues to go through the base's security.

It would be perfect once some Cosmic Era hate is presented.

CM uses the last remaining camera to announce himself saying he will destroy their castle (his term for the base) in a very haughty attitude.

Haaaaaail Coooooobra!

Baku tells Shoot that Cobramaru was notorious at Arc for destroying nine castles with his face only being revealed after that announcement and the destruction of the base would make his tenth. CM makes his way for the connecting pylon between the base and the satellite it hangs on since the pylon is the only part of it not composed of the uber-strong gundanium. Not wanting Neotopia to get squashed he goes after CM in a helicopter ball.

Go go gadget gundam!

CM easily wails on the helicopter ball and reaches the pylon.

Now if only we had an op op at the beginning.

However, Shoot uses the ball's claws to hang on CM's tail as it is surprisingly strong as it easily sways it around despite poor leverage.

To be fair, Godzilla movies follow similar physics.

Shoot being in trouble activates CG's soul drive just as his repairs are complete. He heads out with Physalis Gundam style booster addons and flies toward the scene of the fight.

Stargate: Catapult, only on Syfy.

Cobramaru barely manages to fight back as Captain Gundam Falcon Punches him into the sky, forcing the ninja-bot to fly away in failure.

Manly attack is manly as all hell.

The team is called back to base realizing the alarm was a fake and they have to get GunBike out of a tree.

This is why Team Rocket should not teach our children.

The episode ends with Ashuramaru healing a wound he had in the last episode and he explains in the Zakozako hour that Musha Gundams have a Nanoskin System, allowing them to heal their wounds without repairs.

[DuelGundam2099]

The following users will be spoofed after this review:

-Gubaba
-renegadeleader1
-VF-15 Banshee
-Xard
-Marzan
-anime52k8
-Keith
-Wingnut
-antibiotictab
-Major Focker
-Vifam7
-David Hingtgen
-Archer

If you want to be spoofed just say so, keep in mind this will be in no real order so the who gets spoofed when if purely random. With that said it is time for episode 19 so says the depressed clown.

The episode begins at the same bridge as the fight in ep 17 did with Baku and Ashura about to fight off.

Why does Wal Mart not have sword repairing again?

As they stare each other down, Z2 and several zakus start firing at them only to miss every shot.

Flying does not increase accuracy.

This gains the attention of someone from Arc who distorts space to use the zaku weapons against them before riding in on a mechanical chariot.

Just leave the shark cycles out of this one.

The chariot owner is a Daishogun known as the Daishogun of Pure Virtue, this takes the three Musha Gundams by surprise as one has not been seen in Arc for years.

Then again everyone prefers Burt Reynolds.

Daishogun wants to honor the two warriors by teleporting everyone to the Garden of Spirits, a medieval Japan-like stage designed for the sole purpose of one on one combat.

Unfortunately there are no bathrooms.

Once Daishogun commands it, the fight between Baku and Ashura commences.

Still not as much stock footage as in the average gundam series, quite impressive.

The rest of the episode consists of the two fighting with Baku not being impressed by Ashura's upgrades from his master, KibaOhMaru (mentioned a couple eps back, but kept forgetting until now). After a kamikaze style fighting style near the end, Baku defeats Ashura and wins. I swear without his helmet he resembles Tobikage.

LOVE SURVIVA LOVE SURVIVA!

Ashuramaru's body dissolves as everyone is back at the Neotopian outskirts and his Gun Soul goes to the Daishogun where he will eventually be reincarnated. Daishogun tells Cobramaru to tell his master how Ashuramaru died honorably in combat. Daishogun repairs Bakumetsumaru's sacred sword as a reward and gives him words of encouragement before leaving.

Not those with manly swords.

The Zakozako Hour quickly talks about the Daishogun (mostly his mustache) and the episode ends.

Edited May 16, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

DuelGundam2099 Archer takes on episode 20!

So after some bad narration we get a Yugioh Leo sneaking into town while the main heroes train some furbucket. God Gundam gets philosophy from the old gundam. After bad slapstick jokes we get God Gundam complaining he can't get two hundred rice balls. Then Wing Zero acts like a pedophile toward generic blonde only for her to fall for the furball as she and the human boy's mom talk about whatever. Captain Gundam walks off because FedEx or something while the Leo from earlier acts like Gollum. Later the main character's mother and the blonde dweeb act like robophiles over the old gundam boss until the furry bait breaths fire and burns God Gundam and the rice balls. Wing Zero puts the critter in an orange box and the women bake a cake (wow Gundam, sexist much?). The Leo takes off with the box as GP-01B Gundam comes back only to reveal what he got from China Eggman was facial expressions. The episode ends with the mascot growing to the size of a bear while old gundam leaves. And since when do gundams have teeth? I swear nothing makes sense in this kid show. Oh and Tallgeese acts like Trieze except with Vayate and Mercurius assisting him. Weren't those two dead? You know your show is childish when grunts have to explain things.

I give this series a Pi out of a Baker's Dozen.

Edited May 17, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

DuelGundam2099 renegadeleader1 takes on episode 21!

My gosh this series has psychological issues. The episode starts out with pushing some furry giant only for a bigro to jump out and attack, notice the emphasis on violence over sex. They even have a violent chase scene, clearly written for manchildren. Well, after the Bigro gets murdered we see Tallgeese and his two minions as he must be interested in feather. Bakumetsumaru literally shrunk at the mention of ghosts, such a coward. Some magic version of four square happens pertaining to darkness that traps them, clearly a peril fetish was in mind. Tallgeese gets excited (aroused?) by combining with the Griffin as he acts like a terrorist making demands for a spirit egg only to have rage issues and attack. Some more action happens as Vayate and Mercurius spawn a lightning tornado, clearly a metaphor for World War I. Tallgeese threatens Shoot like a child abuser as this Fenn creature attacks only for the villain to impale him, undoubtedly an allegory for Pablo Escabar. Fenn transforms into a spirit beast called the Feather Dragon who looks like Wing Zero Custom and Serpentera committed rule 34. Zero and Fenn merge, somehow getting past the censors, and resembles either Wing Zero Custom even more or Gavil from Macross 7; wow, DG was not joking about this guy acting metrosexual. Zero defeats the lightning tornado easily and combines a pair of swords to defeat Tallgeese, could you reference the questionable undertones anymore? The villains are sucked into a vortex while everyone else makes it out using the psychological phenomenon of survival skills or this case Zero sacrificing himself. The writers must have had issues as Zero survives by a death beam being propelled at the protagonists being shot out. Bakumetsumaru has an utter breakdown and a feather of Fenn's goes inside Zero's torso. The Zakozako Hour finishes with everyone wondering what happened to Tallgeese as everyone acts depressed with a Leo being a smart alack. It ends with Char's Zaku, known as Zaku Red here, telling everyone to get ready for an invasion.

It scares me that kids actually watched something with this much adult undertones.

Edited May 18, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

DuelGundam2099 Xard takes on episode 22!

Bah, lets start this toy commercial that should not grace the anime industry because it is not art. After a stockfootage introduction the kiddiness begins with a silly in-movie about God Gundam in a samurai costume doing bad acting. My gosh just eat some pineapple with lettuce and die, funny because the in-movie has Kawamori's amazingly fantastic gundam "dying". If this was Utena we'd see adult metaphors already, but no, instead we get people having fun and shooting a movie. I have seen better acting in Obari's ovas, come on and try. Anyway, after they finally start taking the next scene a little seriously, Char's Zaku, as Zaku Red, makes and appearance only for China Eggman and Haro-Head to be contacted by not-Noin that the bad guys are coming through. What do you know it is the BIG ZAM AND ONCE IT IS MASS PRODUCED.... I don't know, maybe Kirino will give into yuri, but regardless Big Zam is piloted by the completely non-sympathetic villains, I mean no three dimensional villains in a CGI show? The irony writes itself. Big Zam tries attacking the SDF base with A BOOMERANG AND HORRIFICALLY FAIL. My gosh it is as though Anno wrote an episode of Macross 7 or something. So Nu Gundam tries fighting it, but since a screwed up lolicon is not his opponent he and some sentient bike cannot damage it. Then some stargate is launched which causes a generic henshin sequence. To think this is from the same franchise that has Unicorn and the lovely Katejina, why you hurt me, Sunrise? You did not even have a moe in it, but this is pre-Ranka era anime so moe were not perfected yet. Continuing on, Big Zam gets knocked off balance by A FRIGGIN BEAM SHOT, not even sure how that is physically possible, only for the cliche villains to reveal "that did nothing". Did none of the writers see a Monty Python movie to see how comedy is done? Unfortunately we just get idiots shooting at each other with a bad lullaby. Some missiles fire and the heroes think they don't have plot armor so they make a big deal out of it. I swear the fight choreography was so bad it makes me want to watch something from Gonzo to get the taste out of my mouth. Continuing, bad antics from Big Zam cause the sky base to fall toward earth or where ever this is supposed to be until the main gundams start thruster cutting. To think this was made after such great anime like Cardcaptor Sakura. The heroes make a butt pull team attack, much like kiddie shows do, Big Zam and some death missile are destroyed, and Team Rocket is blasting off again while Zaku Red acts like sinister yaoi bait in the background. The one good part is that it is still better than PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE PEACE NO KITKAT FOR ME I PREFERE RESSE'S PIECES. It still disgraces what Ghibli did for the industry darn it.

Further proof that deconstructions are the only good entries in genres.

Edited May 19, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

DuelGundam2099 VF-15 Banshee takes on episode 23!

Sigh, lets watch a little children show. Generic dialogue from Red Zaku, some Neo Zeon suits appear, they attack Neotopia because they are generic bad guys, control horns are guided by the plot onto GMs and balls, generic plot points about Shoot's mom worrying, and the plot power of the "Captain System" being mentioned so it isn't as butt-pully. Everyone goes on a journey complete with typical dialogue. Zaku Red sees them coming so he seems competent followed by bearga dogas unloading vulcan guns only to fail because the plot said so and it is very hamfisted. Some Jagd Dogas show up and act like Jerid, I don't know why, maybe because he was advertising for Subawy. Eat Fresh! I will admit this the first time I've seen a motorcycle act like it had a seizure. Once Captain Gundam reached the ring, the plot demands that he does not have enough energy only for the hamfisted transformation to occur because the aqua gundams give him theirs. Deus ex machina occurs to form some light pillar onto a satellite which activates plot powers of the Captain System. Captain Gundams becomes not-Tron and detaches the control horns that way in a hamfisted manner. Why? Apparently Neotopia mobile suits are connected by a network or something. Zaku Red points out the obvious and we just assume the Dark Axis simply leaves- No wait they simply continue their invasion plan. How cliche to end it on a not-cliffhanger.

Darn it DG you should mention things people actually care about, like how the mayor had serious D-Cups or something.

Edited May 20, 2013 by DuelGundam2099

[DuelGundam2099]

DuelGundam2099 anime52k8 takes on episode 24!

How man, this was trippy! We see our main character gundam finding a bagubagu (what they call the bigros in this series) because it is in the matrix- err I mean brain world while Zaku Red spies on the matrix. CG punches a bagubagu in the eye only for another to appear and so on. GunBike complains about being damaged which prevents him from moving. Zaku Red comes up with the idea to steal CG's soul drive because it is rad; on that note, DG had a point about that bridge bunny's voice switching from being feminine to masculine on and off. Meanwhile, the Musai unloads a swarm of bagubagus because they are harsh like that. At the time CG takes on a super strong bagubagu because no eye punching works on this narly bro. Shoot grabs some skates out of nowhere and starts running from the bagubagus while trying to get their attention. During this time Zero and Baku fight very inaccurate jagd dogas. The Musai unloads on CG while he is in the ring. After CG destroys the super bagubagu, the real ones suddenly drop like flies, I bet the spiders will celebrate cinqo de mayo! CG is knocked out by the Musai attack and Zaku Red takes his soul drive like a boss. Shoot picks up high speed swimming lessons to save Captain Gundam like a total dude only to have the ring slam on his head. Somehow he neither drowns nor dies of concussion, this guy would be rad in the surfing competitions! CG transforms into a.... Flying motorcycle? Well the two land on the mayor statue that hijacked many episodes ago while the Musai has serious balls by landing on Neotopia's main platform, causing it to turn into a giant tree-like control horn called the Horn of War. The commander reveals himself to be a Sazabi as Zaku Red gives him the soul drive.... Which causes him to shut down and get kicked off a cliff. Sazabi televises to everyone that he won aaaaaaaand hanging on a cliff ending! Kind of like a half pipe!

That was totally anime! (totally)

Edited May 21, 2013 by DuelGundam2099