Worst Science Fiction Film of All Time II: The Quickening

[areaseven]

Oliver Stone. He's directed cinematic masterpieces such as Platoon, Wall Street, Born on the Fourth of July, and JFK. But in 1981, he wrote and directed The Hand.

James Cameron. He gave us The Terminator and Terminator 2: Judgment Day, Aliens, The Abyss, True Lies, Titanic, and Avatar. But this was where it all started: Piranha II: The Spawning.

[areaseven]

This should be under the Guilty Pleasure thread, but since a lot of members here hate it...

[mechaninac]

Armageddon. That's a perfect example of a movie that can cause brain damage. I saw that movie once -- once was enough -- and I swear I still have some misfiring neurons due to how much it made my brain hurt.

[DuelGundam2099]

I do not see how.

[BeyondTheGrave]

Armageddon. That's a perfect example of a movie that can cause brain damage. I saw that movie once -- once was enough -- and I swear I still have some misfiring neurons due to how much it made my brain hurt.

Better than Deep Impact

[DuelGundam2099]

Deep Impact was friggin fantastic.

[mechaninac]

I do not see how.

Hyperbole is beyond your ability to comprehend, isn't it?

Better than Deep Impact

That's like comparing a turd mound to a pile of crap... they both stink. However, although Deep Impact was boring as hell, and maudlin in the extreme, at least it did not make me cringe as Armageddon's stupefying dumbness did, and is watchable to me.

[DuelGundam2099]

Hyperbole is beyond your ability to comprehend, isn't it?

More like people here keep complaining it is dumb and never say why or how.

[mechaninac]

More like people here keep complaining it is dumb and never say why or how.

The screenplay was awful. The acting was horrendous. The supped-up shuttles were ridiculous. The physics and spaceflight mechanics were laughable. A high caliber machine gun on a rover? Really? The sophomoric stereotyped portrayal of the Russian Cosmonaut on MIR. The very appearance of the asteroid... something that large would've been potato shaped due to gravity -- look at images of Apophis for example -- and not like a crystalline fractal. The screeching sound FX every time they cut to a scene of the asteroid moving through space. Etc.

[sketchley]

That's like comparing a turd mound to a pile of crap... they both stink. However, although Deep Impact was boring as hell, and maudlin in the extreme, at least it did not make me cringe as Armageddon's stupefying dumbness did, and is watchable to me.

o.O (responding to Deep Impact. Fully agree on Armageddon).

I'll agree that Deep Impact was melodramatic at times, but you must keep in mind something when comparing the two:

Armageddon = action

Deep Impact = drama (not quite the best descriptor. What I'm trying to convey is that its about people's reactions to it more than anything else - and one has to admit that the people behind it have got balls for NOT showing all the ICBMs blowing up around the comet, and cutting right to the President's speech about them failing!)

Edited August 27, 2014 by sketchley

[mechaninac]

o.O (responding to Deep Impact. Fully agree on Armageddon).

I'll agree that Deep Impact was melodramatic at times, but you must keep in mind something when comparing the two:

Armageddon = action

Deep Impact = drama (not quite the best descriptor. What I'm trying to convey is that its about people's reactions to it more than anything else)

Totally agree; and what you point out is the reason I can watch Deep Impact from time to time. There's no redeeming Armageddon for me, however... the only way I'd torture myself through it is if I was getting paid, handsomely, to do it.

[anime52k8]

Better than Deep Impact

I agree with this. Armageddon is a terrible, stupid film, but it's so stupid and terrible that you can get some unintentional comedy from watching it. Deep impact was an awful film in every way possible, there's literally nothing redeeming about it and I'd rather have Mike Tyson punch me in the face than watch it.

[JB0]

I like Armageddon. It's stupid fun.

[areaseven]

The biggest problem with Deep Impact is that the trailer spoiled the ending.

[DuelGundam2099]

The screenplay was awful. The acting was horrendous. The supped-up shuttles were ridiculous. The physics and spaceflight mechanics were laughable. A high caliber machine gun on a rover? Really? The sophomoric stereotyped portrayal of the Russian Cosmonaut on MIR. The very appearance of the asteroid... something that large would've been potato shaped due to gravity -- look at images of Apophis for example -- and not like a crystalline fractal. The screeching sound FX every time they cut to a scene of the asteroid moving through space. Etc.

I found none of those to be problems, those seem like nitpicks rather than real flaws.

[anime52k8]

I found none of those to be problems, those seem like nitpicks rather than real flaws.

How are "the writing and acting were bad" nitpicks?

Edited August 27, 2014 by anime52k8

[skullmilitia]

How are "the writing and acting were bad" nitpicks?

Because DG bro.

[DuelGundam2099]

I found nothing really wrong with the writing and people will talk in a wide variety of ways so acting means nothing.

[Duke Togo]

Because DG bro.

Still wondering why you guys take him seriously...

[mechaninac]

Still wondering why you guys take him seriously...

Take DG seriously... hardly. It's more like trowing stones at a hornet's nest; you know you shouldn't do it, and nothing good can come of it, but you just can't help yourself. However, in DG's defense, he is entitled to his opinions... contrarian to widely held views on what constitutes good vs. bad entertainment fare as they are, and the baffling penchant to offer excuses to glaring mediocrity -- it's his schtick, sincere or not.

Edited August 27, 2014 by mechaninac

[areaseven]

This movie has "direct-to-DVD" written all over it.

[areaseven]

W... T... F... ?

[DuelGundam2099]

Do not bring up movies that have not been released yet.

[JB0]

I'm with DuelGundam here. Some of my favorite movies have had terrible trailers.

And while this looks to be abusing Dracula pretty hard... eh, so has everything else. I find it hard to be particularly heartbroken by THIS SPECIFIC abuse of Bram Stoker's creation.

...

Even if he DID just punch an army with his giant batfist. That crap's hilarious.

[DuelGundam2099]

I did worse to Dracula than that.

http://fanfiction.wikia.com/wiki/The_Worst_Christmas_Fic_Ever

[Greyryder]

I just watched 80s B movie The Eliminators last night, for the first time since I was a kid. I'm not sure if it was the worst thing or the best thing, but I enjoyed it far more than I probably should have.

[areaseven]

I just watched 80s B movie The Eliminators last night, for the first time since I was a kid. I'm not sure if it was the worst thing or the best thing, but I enjoyed it far more than I probably should have.

This one?

[areaseven]

On to another topic:

Found Footage Films

Originated by the 1980 Italian exploitation film Cannibal Holocaust, found footage films consist of a low-quality film of home video detailing the last days of the victims being recorded. The sub-genre didn't catch on until 1999, when The Blair Witch Project hit theaters and made over US$248 million at the box office (easily recouping its measly US$23,000 budget). Since then, horror filmmakers have resorted to using the found footage format due to its supposed ability to scare the sh!t out of people at such a minimal cost. Unfortunately, the film industry is now over-saturated with found footage films that are not even that scary - especially Paranormal Activity. Majority of them leave viewers sick only because of the forced shaky-cam effect when the person holding the camera is running around like crazy.

Of all the found footage films out there in the market, which is the worst?

[Old_Nash]

I watch it yesterday and...

Mas que porra é essa????

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zz9g-rinfvk

A film without rhyme or reason that instead of doing something, delivers another totally bad.

Seriously, who read a screenplay and approves these should be hospitalized or arrested.

How the hell can spoil something that could not be further damaged?

[Greyryder]

This one?

That's the one!

[areaseven]

Recently, I had the misfortune of watching Tekken 2: Kazuya's Revenge. To call it a horrible movie is an understatement, as it's one of the most misleading films ever made. As a means to maintain their live-action rights to the Tekken franchise, Crystal Sky Pictures took a random generic martial arts film and slapped the Tekken name on it. Only three characters from Tekken show up, but they look nothing like their game counterparts. Sure, Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa is reprising his role as Heihachi Mishima, but the lack of wavy hair shows that this was intended to be a completely different movie. Even the film setting contradicts that of the first film, with normal daytime shots as opposed to the first's Blade Runner-ish darkness. The King of Fighters is still the worst film adaptation of a video game, but this one comes close.

BTW, this movie was directed by Wych Kaos, who made his Hollywood debut with this box office bomb: Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever.

[areaseven]

Only 10?

[anime52k8]

Only 10?

Well if you don't narrow it down it would just be 'a list of Adam Sandler movies'. Edited September 8, 2014 by anime52k8

[Dangard Ace]

I just watched 80s B movie The Eliminators last night, for the first time since I was a kid. I'm not sure if it was the worst thing or the best thing, but I enjoyed it far more than I probably should have.

What is this masterpiece? It's like what they must've based FarCry3: Blood Dragons on. Must watch.

Did anyone nominate this turd yet?

[Kanedas Bike]

No way!

Evolution was 100% Grade A guilty, stupid (stoopid) pleasure. Haven't seen it in years but it was a fun type of stupid and IMO didn't take itself seriously at all, mostly because it was a comedy.

I mean, c'mon - Head n Shoulders

-b.